I cannot believe my little girl, my tiny fur ball who weighed about 12 pounds when I first brought her home is now almost as tall as Zen and weighs about 61 pounds! Where have these last 18 months gone??
She’s gone from this…
To this…
In 18 short, sometimes seemingly never-ending, months!
It’s been a roller-coaster ride at times with her separation anxiety and quirky habits/obsessions; but the bonds between her and Zen and between her and me are beautiful to witness. She is such a sweet, loving, playful pup that one can’t help but fall in love with her.
Happy Half-Year Birthday Zo-Zo!! Zen and I love you!!
I can’t believe my big boy, my sunshine, my leprechaun, my pot of gold, my lucky charm is suddenly two years old! 💚🐾☘️🐾
Hi Mom!
Before Bogie’s ashes even came home, I was looking forward to Zen’s arrival. I had promised Ducky that we would get her another baby brother to help her deal with Daddy’s dementia demons. Then Ducky left me, too. I was devastated. But once the shock wore off and I was left with just the reality of her absence, I knew Ducky would pick the perfect puppy for me. I just had to wait patiently. That waiting wasn’t easy in between Sam’s dementia-induced “episodes” but I managed. And suddenly, on St. Patrick’s Day 2022, on their mama’s birthday, my little furball and his nine siblings were born. I was soooo excited! And Sam was excited (when his dementia allowed him some control).
Zen and his siblings, about 2 weeks old
Oh! They were soooo cute and tiny! Baby leprechauns all! When they were three weeks old, Sam and I went to see them. I saw baby Zen, with his smudge muzzle, looking at us from under a chair and fell in love.
Look at that sweet little face
He stole my heart even then, but at just three weeks old he wasn’t ready to choose his humans yet. So we went back to see all the puppies again the following week. And I let Ducky do the choosing. I knew she would whisper in the right puppy ear. It took a little extra encouragement from Ducky because Sam’s demons were lurking in the shadows; but that little cutie I had already fallen in love with picked me. And eventually picked Sam too.
Soooo sweet!Hi DaddyOur Zen-puppy and Us
So much has happened since that day four weeks after Zen was born that I couldn’t possibly include it all here. Some of it was heartbreaking, some of it was truly frightening, a lot of it loaded with anxiety. But once Sam was in a place where I knew he would be cared for professionally and compassionately, the anxiety eased enough that I could bring Zen back home. So I did and our relationship, our bond has been growing.
Zen Hugs
We’ve had our times when my journey into widowhood has made for tense moments, but we’ve gotten through them relatively unscathed and more bonded as a result. Zen has truly been my “rock” throughout these 17+ months since Sam joined Bogie, Ducky, and our other pups at the Rainbow Bridge to wait for me.
Then, six months and one day after Zen was born, his little cousin Zoey came into this world with her own nine siblings. I knew I wanted another girl to love. And I knew raising pups of the opposite sex would be challenging. But I felt up to it and Zen needed a playmate. So, six months to the day after Sam and I brought Zen home for the first time, I brought Zoey home while my brother stayed with Zen.
Getting to Know You…🎶This photo brings back memories of Callie and Shadow at the same ages.
Zen is not just my rock; he’s also an excellent big brother.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZEN-ZEN!! ☘️☘️🎂🎉🎈 Zoey and I love you and will do all we can to make your day as special as you are! 💚💚💚💚💚
January 14, 2022 was the worst day of my life, of all our – Sam’s, Ducky’s, and my brother’s – lives. And, to be honest, the first day of the worst year of my life. It was the day my sweet Bogie got his angel wings. And it was the day that my sweet Ducky’s heart broke irreparably. That sweet, loving, adorable boy. Just thinking about how it happened still brings a flood of tears – the bitter part of my memories. All I can do is thank God for allowing Sam and me to be his human parents and Ducky to be his “big sister” for his short life.
How could you not love that face?!
I will always miss this boy. He loved snuggling with me, and I loved snuggling with him. Bogie was the reason why I decided to get another “baby brother” for Ducky as soon as I could, which leads me to the sweet part of my memories…
A few days after Bogie got his wings, I called our friend and Bogie’s “Grandpa Chuck” and told him “I want another baby brother for Ducky. I’ll send you a check tomorrow.” Even though Ducky’s broken heart earned her her own angel wings a month later, I knew she would pick the perfect puppy for us. And she did….
4-Week-Old Zen
This adorable little smudge muzzle was born on March 17, 2022 but even before then he became my sunshine boy. Sam’s dementia took nearly total control of him after Ducky got her wings; and the only thing I felt I had to smile about was knowing I would soon have another puppy to love on and be loved by. So Zen became my sunshine. When he was born, I decided his Gotcha Day would have to be on the monthly anniversary of Bogie’s passing. I needed a happy event to balance the tragic one. So Sam and I brought Zen home on May 14th.
After Ducky passed, I knew Zen would eventually need a playmate, and I wanted another girl. At first I wasn’t sure I could deal with two puppies and Sam. I kept wondering out loud if I had lost my marbles somewhere along the way. But Zen was such an easy puppy once Sam was admitted to the hospital, that I stopped wondering. Shortly after Sam was admitted to the hospital, Bogie’s mama, Bailey, was mated with his daddy’s brother so I knew the chances of getting a female version of my Bogie were pretty darn good. And the chances of her being exactly six months younger than Zen were good, too. It turned out to be six months and a day, but that’s close enough. So the second sweet part of my memories came into my life….
Baby Zoey Petunia at about 6 weeks.
Look at that foot in the water bowl! To this day, she thinks water is for more than just drinking, just like Bogie! And Zoey’s Gotcha Day became November 14th, exactly six months after Zen, and ten months after us losing her older genetic brother. And, oh my doG, does she ever remind me of Bogie! She looks just like him and she acts just like him. She is a snuggle bunny just like Bogie was; and she’s sassy with Zen like Bogie was with Ducky.
So, as bitter as the memories are of losing sweet Bogie that awful day two years ago, at least his younger cousin and sister provide me with extra sweet memories for counterbalance. And truthfully Bogie’s not gone. He’s here every day, along with Ducky and their human daddy. I just can’t see him or love on him.
Since this past Tuesday was also Zen’s (half-year) Gotcha Day – he’s been with me for 18 months – it’s only fitting that I should give him his own post on Thankful Thursday.
Zen and I have been through so much together in his short lifetime…his human daddy’s dementia and subsequent last months at home and then his passing; my relief and grief over my human soulmate’s passing; all the repair jobs that have had to be done on and in the house; and then the first holidays without hubby, Ducky, and Bogie. And my dear, sweet boy helping me raise his little sister. Then he guided me through his angel brother/cousin Bogie’s first anniversary in Heaven; Bogie’s, hubby’s, and Ducky’s first birthdays in Heaven; and then Ducky’s first anniversary in Heaven. And my own little health scare, which thankfully turned out to be minor and easily resolved.
That’s A LOT to go through in the span of a year and a half! But my boy got me through all of it. He has been here for me through thick and thin. Just as his mentor, Ducky, was all those years before and would have been if she could have. But in truth, she was here in spirit … mentoring and helping Zen to help me as she would have done. ❤️🩹❤️🩹
Zen is my sunshine boy. My leprechaun (he, like his birth mama, was born on St. Patrick’s Day), my huggy-bear, my earthbound guardian angel with paws, my helper. And while he is maturing into a calm adult, he is still very much a puppy when playing with his little sister.
I thank Ducky every day for picking Zen out for me…she knew exactly which of Bogie’s baby cousins would be perfect for her grieving mama.
How is it even possible that you’ve been here with Zen and me for a full year already?! Here you are that first night home …
Getting to know each other
I still remember trying to will you and your littermates to be born the day before you actually were … I wanted you and Zen to be exactly six months apart. Oh well, at least I could make your Gotcha Days six months apart.
Oh, those puppy teeth!
You’ve been growing physically and emotionally; but you’re still very much a puppy with all that energy. You keep Zen and me on our toes, for sure! Now that you can hold your own against Zen, you have wrestling matches that admittedly make me nervous at times.
You Reap What You Sow, Zoey
Zoey had been pestering Zen earlier in the day, so when he started in on her, I started recording. Zen is so tolerant, so patient with her most of the time. I love when he gives it back to her.
My Little Girl’s Not So Little Now
The more I look at Zoey, the more I see Bogie in her eyes and heart. She just looks and acts SO MUCH like her older angel brother! It’s really uncanny. Maybe God sent Bogie back to me in Zoey to give him a second chance at life? I don’t know; but it sure feels that way at times. She’s a lovebug, a sweet, sassy lovebug, and I’m glad Ducky and Bogie sent her to Zen and me!! 💜💜💜💜
HAPPY 1st GOTCHA DAY ZOEY! We love you, little one!!
It’s hard to believe that this sweet, loving, precious angel-with-paws was born a year ago today! And it’s hard to believe that she was once this small….
Zoey & Siblings 2 Days Old
I remember trying to “will” her to be born the day before, on Zen’s half-year birthday, so I’d have another pair of puppies born exactly six months apart. Well, one day’s not a big deal. 😊
Long-time readers may (or may not) remember that my first two Golden babies were born exactly six months apart…Callie on April 16, 2004 and Shadow on October 16, 2004. (And their Gotcha Days were also exactly 6 months apart, June 7th and Dec. 7th.) But I’m drifting here, so back to Zoey.
This sweet little girl has brought Zen and me so much joy! She’s just what we needed…Zen needed a playmate and I needed another little girl, but one who would snuggle with me like her angel-brother Bogie used to. My two Z Kids bonded right from the start into a mutual adoration society.
Zoey’s First Night Home
And as she grew, big brother Zen let her climb all over him…
💚 Sibling Love 💜
Zoey still climbs all over her brother and loves to curl up and snuggle with him….
❤️🐾🐾❤️
Happy First Birthday my sweet and sassy little girl! Zen and I love you to the end of the universe and back! You complete our little family. Today is your day. Thankfully the sun is shining again after yesterday’s rain made Zen’s half-year birthday kinda gloomy – weather-wise only – so we can spend time playing in the sunshine like we all love to do. ☀️☀️☀️
How appropriate that the 14th day of this month should fall on a Thankful Thursday! Why? Because it’s a very special day in my life…it’s the Z Kids’ Monthly Gotcha Day! Zen has been with me for 16 months; and Zoey has been with us for 10 months. And in less than a week, Zen will be 18 months old and Zoey will be a full year old. But more about birthdays next week.
I can hardly believe my Zen has been here 16 months already! Most of last year was so dark; but this sweet boy was my one ray of sunshine after Ducky got her wings. Knowing Zen was on the way is what kept me going. And when he was born on St. Patrick’s Day, he became my little leprechaun, my Golden Boy.
Mama’s Special Angel with Paws
He grew up to be my best friend; my Ducky’s facilitator – she visits me often through the baby brother she picked out for me; my guardian angel with paws; my watch dog; my confidant; my helper; my mostly independent, self-confident hooligan. And a wonderful big brother to Zoey.
Big Brother/Little Sister
And, while Zen stayed here at home with his human uncle, I drove up to his Golden Family’s house to get Zoey. I had hoped that Zoey would be born on Zen’s first half birthday, but she had her own plan. That’s okay. I could still make her Gotcha Day the same day of the month as Zen’s. ❤️🐾 And here she is as that 8-week-old puppy.
Baby Zoey
She’s nearly a year old! I can’t believe how fast these 10 months have flown by! She’s growing up, but she’s still small for her age. I love how her tail feathering is so “floofy”! It’s hard to see in my photos of her, but here she is now…
My little “tomboy” loves the dirt!
This little girl is my kindred spirit…as much a “tomboy” as I was when I was a little girl. I climbed trees with the boys next door; Zoey’s happiest playing catch in the dirt and dust of the back yard with her brother.
Happy (Monthly) Gotcha Day my sweet hooligans!! I love you both with my whole heart! 💚🐾💜🐾
Zoey came into her first season some time yesterday; so technically speaking she’s not a “baby” any more. But she will always be MY baby. She was feeling a bit tired this morning, so she snuggled up to me while I drank my first cup of coffee.
🐾💜 Mama’s Snuggle Puppy 💜🐾
Of course Zen’s butt had to photobomb the sweetness, but that’s okay. 💚🐾
My sweet little girl. Zen’s sweet – and sassy – little sister. This munchkin is approaching her teenage months, bless her heart. I think she’s close to coming into her first season…she has a hard time getting comfortable, panting hard at times and then relaxing for a few minutes.
And for now she’s quietly resting – still here on the couch with me – while Zen sleeps at my feet. The perfect way to start a weekend…with my (fur) babies at my side or at least close by. 💚🐾💜🐾
in my heart 4ever 