I’m sure you’ve all heard that warning before. But have you ever paid much attention to it? I know I didn’t, really. Until one morning at the end of last month …..
For most of March and April, I was burning out from being “Mom” to the Z Kids without the help of a “Daddy.” I was lamenting the days before Zoey joined Zen and me.
Don’t get me wrong. I love Zoey dearly and wouldn’t give her up for anything other than her own well-being. But her isolation anxiety was taking its toll on me, on Zen, and on our relationship. And it was – of course – taking its toll on Zoey herself and our relationship with each other. Even some stress on Zen’s and Zoey’s relationship with each other.
So back to my lamenting, my burning out. I was tired. I was frustrated. I was sad and scared. And I wasn’t eating enough of the right foods. TBH, I wasn’t eating enough, period. And I was constantly saying to Zen that “I love Zoey dearly, but I miss the days when it was just the two of us.”
On the morning of April 25th I woke up early, and as usual, started to sit up in bed. But I was so dizzy I had to lay back down. I waited a moment and tried again. Same thing. Then I started to panic. How would I take care of the puppies if I couldn’t even take care of myself. I called my friend, and the pups’ “Grandpa,” and left a message in his voicemail. Then I tried again to sit up. Same dizziness. I laid back down and checked my heart rate. Normal. Waited another ten minutes or so and checked again. Normal again. Still dizzy but not quite as bad. No nausea, sweats, or aches and pains, just dizzy.
Called my friend again. He said he’d get ready to come down to get Zen and Zoey, so the panic subsided. Still a little dizzy but not as bad. Almost an hour had passed. The dizziness was subsiding as well. Zen was on the bed with me, laying right next to me. Zoey was in her crate next to the bed, waiting patiently for me to let her out. Once the dizziness had passed, I got dressed and let Zoey out of her crate. We went into the kitchen, slowly, but I felt normal and steady on my feet. Then my friend’s daughter arrived and we sat and talked for a few minutes.
We took the pups out to the yard to relieve themselves and play some. My earthly guardian angel was on the way and his daughter had to leave for an appointment. But I was feeling 100% better and fully steady on my feet. And Zen continued to keep a watchful eye on me while he and Zoey played in the living room.
My friend arrived and we sat and talked for a bit while I ate the breakfast biscuit he had picked up for me on his way here. He was still willing to take both pups home with him; but I knew I’d go out of my mind if I stayed home completely alone. So he took Zoey home with him and Zen stayed with me.
Zoey stayed with her “Grandpa” and other doggie family for a few days while I pulled myself together. Zen watched me like a hawk. When I had to go to the store to get food, our regular pet sitter stayed with him. The rest of the time I spent here at home, making sure I ate three balanced meals a day and spending time with Zen. And texting with my friend, sending photos back and forth.
Those few days Zoey was with her Grandpa, I truly paid attention to that old line about being careful what you wish for. And I thanked God endlessly for giving me the warning that He had. And I thanked my friend, his daughter, and another dear friend (who had brought me some homemade comfort food later that day) for being there for me – once again – in my hours of need. I honestly don’t know what I would have done if I had had to fend for myself that day.
I’m very careful now about what I wish for; and I’m very careful about taking care of myself as well as the Z Kids. And I constantly thank God and all my guardian angels for watching over us all. the. time. I’m feeling much better now, exactly a month later. And Zen keeps a watchful eye on me still, enlisting Zoey’s aid when he needs a break. I am thankful for these two earth angels of mine, too. Our relationships – mine with each of them separately and theirs with each other – have improved tremendously.
With that all said, I’m linking to the Thankful Thursday blog hop. Thankful for ALL my blessings, especially the ones I tend to take for granted at times.