A Letter to My Golden Girls

Dear Callie and Shadow,

You girls have been together in Heaven now for three months. I miss you more every day. And I will always love you with my whole heart.

Callie, from the moment you were born you started filling a need in me.

When Kissy passed away, there was a hole in my life that nothing could fill. She was my first “fur-baby” and my soul mate in so many ways. I knew no other dog could replace her – and I wasn’t interested in trying to – but I missed the pitter-patter of doggie paws and the companionship of a soul who loved me unconditionally.

When Debbie told me you had been born, I knew my heart would start to heal. Little did I know that you would end up teaching me far more than I could ever teach you. You were such a sweet puppy; and you had an independent streak. Kissy had been wholly dependent on me, so I had to learn to accept that streak. You helped me accept it, and I quickly learned to love you for it. When Shadow joined our little family, you immediately took on the role of surrogate mama. You helped me raise her; and quite honestly you did a better job than me.

Shadow, you were such a sweet little puppy, too; but you didn’t have that independent streak like Callie. You were more “needy” like Kissy. You were my “Velcro Dog”. But you were a bit mischievous too. I still remember the day you grabbed your Grandpa’s hearing aid out of his lap and swallowed it whole. Dr. Steve was already gone for the day so I had to make a few phone calls before I knew what to do. You poor pup, you were so miserable the rest of that day; but at least you regurgitated the hearing aid the same way you swallowed it – in one piece.

And you were constantly trying to get out of the kitchen at night before you were house trained. Callie spent many a night sleeping on the carpet in the hallway, on the opposite side of the baby gate, so you wouldn’t feel so alone.

You girls were inseparable, almost literally. Especially at Dr. Steve’s office. Callie was always the brave, happy girl and Shadow the not-so-brave, reserved one. But as long as Callie was there with you, Shadow, you were a bit braver. When Callie had to have her knee-repair surgeries, you always seemed so “lost” without her. You clung to me most of the day while she was at the hospital. And when she came home and had to rest, you glued yourself to her side. You took care of her just as she always took care of you.

When Ducky Doodle Demon Dog joined the family, you girls had to put up with so much from her. Callie, you were the most patient one of us all. Bless you for that! All those times you played peacemaker between Shadow and Ducky? You were my hero. And the times you wouldn’t let Ducky exclude Shadow from your games? You never ceased to amaze me with your patience. And, Shadow, you sweet girl. You tried so hard to emulate Callie; but Ducky continually pushed your buttons.

Sabine earned my eternal gratitude when she convinced me to set up an intro date for Ducky at daycare. A Dog’s Day Out turned out to be the best option for all of us. And her first day was your eighth birthday, Shadow. And Callie’s half-birthday. It was probably the best gift I could have given you girls, along with the walk at the park later that morning.

Callie, when you went to Heaven we were all devastated, but poor Shadow most of all. I know you spent those last months of your life trying to prepare us – especially Shadow – for our impending loss. You did your best to teach Shadow how to deal with Ducky. And you did your best to teach Ducky how to be a good little sister. And you taught me how to manage the two of them. I hope I made you proud as you watched from Heaven. Shadow, you and I helped each other and Daddy through our grief. And we helped Ducky. I think Ducky helped us all more than we gave her credit for back then.

Shadow, when you were declining and I was in denial at times, I know you tried to tell me your time was near. And you tried to tell me you’d be okay once you reunited with Callie. Ducky was so good with you those last few weeks. She stuck by your side – just as Callie had always done – and made me so proud. I could almost see Callie smiling down on her. When it was time to say goodbye for now, sweet Ducky gave you kisses just as she had Callie that morning she left us. For weeks, Ducky looked for you almost everywhere. As time goes by, she accepts more and more that you’re not coming home. But, like me, she senses your – and Callie’s – spiritual presence, usually even before I do. Being Ducky, though, she is enjoying getting all the attention. She misses you girls in ways Daddy and I can’t because we’re a different specie; but she has been our rock. She is our little breathing entertainment center. She makes us scream with exasperation at times, but she also makes us laugh. I know you girls made it possible for our hearts to expand to include Ducky, and I thank you both for that blessing.

Always Remembered…

Forever Loved.

14 thoughts on “A Letter to My Golden Girls

  1. Jan K says:

    I LOVE that photo! This is a beautiful post, Sue. I know your special girls will always be with you in spirit, but I knew how much you still miss them as well. ♥♥♥ Hugs to you and Ducky!

    Liked by 1 person

    • My Golden Life says:

      Thanks, Jan! I’ve always loved both of the photos, but especially the one where Baby Shadow is snuggled up next to Callie. It says it all. They were like that from Day One to the last one; and I’m sure they are like that now, in Heaven, as they watch over us. ❤️😇❤️😇


  2. Dakota/Caren/Cody says:

    This was so beautiful, I am in tears. I love how you described each of your babies in such a beautiful and special way. I know today is hard as you remember, sending love and (((hugs))), thank you for this beautiful post.

    Liked by 1 person

    • My Golden Life says:

      Aw, thanks Caren! I was a bit teary-eyed myself while I was writing it. It’s hard to believe that Shadow was reunited with Callie three months ago already. Some days it feels more like three hours ago. But they were both ready to be reunited, so how could I deny them? They knew their little sister would take good care of us – and she has – because they did such a good job of helping me raise her. Hugs back at ya! And ear and belly rubs for Dakota and Cody.


  3. edgar62 says:

    It’s been nearly four years since my Foxy Lady and my Maltese Terrorist died, one after the other and I still talk to them. Benji is not a replacement for them but he needed me to adopt him and give him a home, I needed him to fill an ache in me. He was very forgiving when I called him Chienne or referred to him as Chi – he still is. I have always believed that Heaven is a reflection of Earth, without all the bad stuff, thus my heaven would mean that I would be in open, endless fields, mountains in the background and surrounded by all the dogs I have known in my life. And yes, I worry about me too at times.

    Liked by 1 person

    • My Golden Life says:

      Your Heaven sounds, well, heavenly. I would simply add the people I loved as well – my parents, grandparents, etc. – and a bowling alley because my Mom’s father and my parents all enjoyed bowling with their friends when I was growing up…and I enjoyed watching them.


  4. My GBGV Life says:

    It’s been almost 7 months for us losing Emma and my mom cries every day, she even talks out loud to Emma a lot. She loves us to pieces, but she just can’t get over losing Emma. Katie and Emma were so close, and we know they are now together, but Mom just can’t get over losing Emma. She will never live without having a dog, but no one can fill the hole losing a dog leaves. All we new pups can do is make new memories and try to turn sadness into smiles, but it is a very difficult task. We all feel for you and your losses.

    Liked by 1 person

    • My Golden Life says:

      You can tell your Mom that I talk to Callie and Shadow out loud a lot, too. And I cry, too. I know how she feels about you and Bailie, and about losing Emma…I feel the same way about Ducky and about losing both Callie and Shadow…You girls are your Mom’s rock just as Ducky is mine. 😍😍😍


  5. Tails Around the Ranch says:

    That was so beautiful and yes, I’m ugly crying now. For I too, along with everyone who was blessed to find your blog loved your Callie and Shadow girls. And so grateful that Ducky is with you to guide you as manage your hub’s health issues. Sending hugs and tail wags this ‘howliday’ weekend. 😍

    Liked by 1 person

Comments are closed.